New Year, New You

Here we are in a New Year full of new possibilities.  Forgive me, but I’m going to buck convention here a little and tell you NOT to make New Year’s resolutions.  I say this for a very good reason.  We put way too much emphasis and importance of Jan 1^st.  Every Dec 31^st we make a vow to completely reinvent ourselves.  New Year, New You.  But the sad fact is that by February 80% of us will have abandoned those resolutions.  Once broken, we won’t even try to get back on track.  We’ll throw up our hands and resign ourselves to try again next year.  Sad, but true.  If that in some way disappoints you, here’s a truth that might help.  You were okay to begin with.  You have friends and family that love you because of (and at times in spite of) who you already are.  Becoming a completely different person betrays the idiosyncrasies that make you wonderfully unique.  I myself eat food that’s bad for me, let laundry pile up until I’m down to my last pair of socks, and dream of a world where people spontaneously break into song and dance.   It’s who I am and I own it.

Now, I’m not saying change is a terrible thing.  I’m slowly trying to change my diet and I now exercise regularly (the laundry can wait).  But the fact is that I didn’t make those changes because of an arbitrary date of the Gregorian calendar.  I did it because it was time.  I decided I don’t want to die so I took steps to avert an early demise.  I made that decision on a Tuesday.  November 3, 2015 to be exact.  See, change doesn’t have to happen on January 1^st, or the first of the month, or on a Monday.  It happens the minute you say yes to yourself.  If there is something you truly dislike about yourself, then make the decision to SLOWLY correct that behavior or aspect.  But be reasonable.  When I decided to change my diet and activity level I didn’t resolve to make it onto America’s Next Top Model.  My resolution was to avoid having a heart attack and dying.  So far, mission accomplished.

I should also note that I made the decision to change for completely self-serving reasons.  I didn’t do so to gain friends or lovers (which is good because it hasn’t worked, damn it).  I didn’t do it because someone else harped on me to change.  I did it because my mom died early as did her mother, and her mother’s mother, and so on for the past 5 generations.  I don’t want to be next.  I changed for myself.  Change that is made to appease someone else’s desire is unfulfilling and destined to fail.  Anyone who tries to force change on you obviously doesn’t love or understand you. 

We can all agree that, for the most part, 2016 was a pretty lousy year.  It’s fine to want to leave last year’s baggage behind as the clock strikes midnight.  It’s great in theory, but this year let’s try to be more realistic.  And just in case you should falter on those champagne induced pledges, remember that every day is itself a new beginning and a chance to try again.  Even on a Tuesday.  So feel free to try a different shade of lipstick, go commando once just to say you have, or, should the mood strike you, spontaneously break into song and dance.  Make it the best Tuesday ever.